28 December 2003

[Tomorrow]

With Tricia returning to her Los Angeles home (boo), I will be returning to my mediocre life, which is demanding much needed attention, as marked by the dust on my shelves, dishes in my sink, and grime in the bathroom grout. Apparently, the week-long alcohol-induced haze has made me immune to such things. What filth I tolerate! But before I take a fine-tooth comb to nooks and crannies of my apartment, arming the Swiffer and replacing the cat-litter, I will take a trip to Kenwood Towne Centre to purchase an evening gown for New Year's Eve, and whatever festivities it may bring my way. I will have to find something to complement the pearl necklace Sean gave me for my birthday; I've been wanting to wear it, but I have nothing dressy enough. Well, I do, but the black Catherine Coatney gown I purchased some time ago -- but have only donned once -- is too Warehouse-esque, according to Sean. And as much as I was slightly perturbed by the observation (it *is* a nice dress), I do agree that I should -- at twenty-six -- dress more "adult" (and "adult" as in grown up, not "pay-per-jerk," er, I mean, "view"). But then again, if nothing catches my eye at the mall, I will fall back on the gown for Wednesday. Because, well, not many people can pull off black velvet in this city without looking like NASCAR-goth. Yeah, I'm hot. Well, that was a loopity-loop non-sensical process of thought. As I was saying, I will be venturing up I-71 to the Montgomery area in search of the perfect dress. Armed with two-hundred dollars in mall gift certificates (Every Christmas, the parents at the school my mom works at, collect money for the faculty and staff. This year, she was given over fivehundred dollars in gift certificates, which she so generously shared with my dad, my brother, and myself.), I will check out the women's clothing at the major department stores, as well as a few clothing stores, most likely Bebe, Express, and Cache. Sean expressed interest in accompanying me, but I'm afraid it might end in a fight over "it's too slutty" or "I'm too bloated" or any of the complaints I've either heard or said while trying on clothes. Besides, I don't want to feel like I'm dragging him around aimlessly -- it's bad enough that I *know* I, myself, will be led around by my indecisiveness' chain and whip, as I always am when shopping (I generally like to visit the mall with a set plan of action, to make the trip as brief and painless as possible). But then again, this might afford the opportunity for something kinky in a dressing room. Which reminds me of that episode of "Sex and the City" when Carrie was dating that twenty-something and, while shopping at the Banana Republic (or some other clothing shop marked by their plain sweaters and logo fleece t-shirts), they start to make out in a dressing room, only to be chastised by a store employee: "This isn't the Gap!" Priceless.

24 December 2003

[Observation]

I haven't had an alcoholic beverage since Monday night. Two consecutive days of sobriety. I can't believe it.

22 December 2003

[Just Precious]

“I dropped out of high school. I can barely write. I'm white trash. I wear leather bracelets and tattoos. But God has given me a gift — to relate to people and see the common sense of the Bible.” Jimmy and Tammy Faye Bakker's son, Jay. Sorry about this post. I about peed on myself when I read this quote.

20 December 2003

[I like to point and laugh]

My Bible-banging, youth-minister cousin, who married back in September, NEVER sent thank you cards to me, my parents, or my brother for buying him and his teenage wife wedding presents. I'm not sure what my parents purchased, but Adam bought them some nice kitchen utensils, and I bought them candles, bath salts, and a picture frame. I didn't even get my own invite to the wedding (remember, how I ranted about how I am often treated by my extended family as "the relative who can't wipe her own ass" because I'm not the most "settled" [or Christian] person and about how I was not "grown up" enough to have an invitation sent to my apartment), so I really was under no obligation whatsoever to buy Eric and what's-her-face (Becky, I think) a gift. Oh, let me make excuses for them. Really, how can I expect a twenty-two year old boy and an eighteen year old girl to know about common courtesies such as thank you cards? And, well, there were like five-hundred church goers at the wedding, people who attend his church, who live in his white-trash community. It's no big deal to forget about family, especially if they are inner city, left-winged freaks. And, really, it's the parents' fault, particularly Becky's mother's fault. Right? The bride's mom is supposed to be on the ball about these things, especially if her daughter is too busy post-wedding trying to bust her Christian coochie and learning to accept that her life has been pissed into the wind. Oh, and I totally forgot about this: my gifts were not from the registry. Silly me. How could I expect a thank you card if I didn't spend the thirty bucks on the carrot peeler approved by the American Arthritis Association? My mom is half laughing/half fuming about the situation. I ALWAYS wrote thank you cards to friends and family who attended significant events or get-togethers. Shit, I even wrote notes to those who couldn't make it to my college graduation party, but, at least, RSVP'd and sent their best wishes. Someone is DEFINITELY NOT getting invited to my Elvis/Pirate wedding in Vegas.

20 December 2003

[Note:]

Tricia & Angie, We should go to a strip club. A nasty one in Covington or Newport. Really. It'll be fun. We'll get kicked out for being hot.

18 December 2003

[oof]

Just now getting over last night's drinking. The liver is toasty, indeed.

16 December 2003

[I am so ahead of things:]

School is back in session January 5th, and the syllabi for all three of my classes, English 102, English 103, and Preparatory Composition, are all done, done like cake. I even have all my major writing assignments prepared. This is a first in Amanda's four year history of teaching. I'm generally tweaking my syllabi the day before the term and writing up assignment guidelines the minute before I introduce assignments in class. Perhaps 2004 will be a return to my former prompt, get-things-done-early self. Or not. I've noticed that since the Fall term, for me, is done -- no students, no grading, and definitely NO work e-mail or v-mail checks (I refuse to cater to students [and parents] with their issues and complaints until the start of the Winter term) -- life has been fairly uneventful and calm. However, I figure I've earned this. Anyone who came over Saturday and read the "lower" half of my English 102 1:00pm class portfolios understands. With this said, there is much less drama and angst to unfold here. I'm a terribly dull person when not fuming about something. I apologize for this.

13 December 2003

[Paper Grading Extravaganza]

Be careful! As Cincinnati drivers, as per usual, FREAK THE FUCK OUT when it snows a tad. I hope more than two people come over tonight!

13 December 2003

[For New Year's]

I want to get dressed up and spend too much money at some fancy club. Oh, I forgot where I lived for a second! Excuse me :/

10 December 2003

[To Do List:]

Finish washing dishes. Clean Kitchen. Clean Bathroom. Cover up wall braces in bedroom. Purchase freakishly large poster to mask the wall braces in the bedroom. Vacuum rugs. Swiffer floor. Buy vodka, cranberry juice, limes, lime juicer, Triple Sec, martini glasses, pitcher, and martini shaker. Take Prep. Comp. and Prep. Reading and Writing II portfolios to the adjunct office and stash them in a file cabinet. Print out my English 102 and 103 reading lists and assignments for Mei Ying and Pat. Write up five-point quizzes for 102 and 103 reading lists(I am planning on giving daily quizzes next quarter to weed out the bullshit students EARLY). Fine tune 102, 103, and Prep. Comp. syllabi for next quarter! At least all my clothes are clean, after my day o' laundry fun yesterday!

07 December 2003

[ Tiffany Thiesen is out to ruin Jake.]

Today I spent five hours in a portfolio committee, evaluating portfolios from three Preparatory Composition courses. Three of my students "earned" NPs (Not Proficient) and must retake the course. I am not surprised. I can't beat myself up for it; I did all I could for J., J., and M. Besides, I think they should have been placed in Preparatory Reading and Writing II, the course below Prep. Comp. Ya can't eat stones in the desert, or whatever. There's no beating my balls.

4 December 2003

[Just a note]

People on Jerry Springer really shouldn't get naked Really, folks, think about the children.